If you have it.... Flaunt it :-)

My Latest Gizmo! Apple Ipod - Touch

Shot Dead !

Flash News !!!!

An Indian National was shot dead in his hotel room late last nite about 4.30 AM PST. The motive behind the murder is still unknown, Investigative agencies are still clueless. There seem to be no leads at all !

Well, After having such a fantastic day in the sea-world that was a horrible dream to have, anyway by far this was the scrariest dream i ever had, i am wondering why would anyone want to shoot me. Probably reading about all the shootings going around, the church, the mall etx induced this. I dont really know. The dream itself, though scary was sooo real !

hope i have no more of those, Man i was having such a good time ! :-)

San-Tosh Goes to San-Diego

Finally It happened. After having heard every one rave about The Sea World, Was more than eagar to see this one and man was it worth it ! The sea world by it self did not appeal much to me other than Shamu of course.

The Arctic experience was another nice thing, its amazing how these guys can transport us to a virtual Arctic Zone with White Whales, Walrus and Polar bears for company. 60 $ total vasool i say !

Had a horrible 9 $ Lunch, Thew it in the bin ! Lesson Learnt , Next time i will stick to Fries and Coke :-)

Shamu Rocks !

Sea World Pics...

Been There... Done That (3)

Here are few more things on which, in times to come i can say....Hey! Been there... Done That

• Saw this amazing Aquarium of the Pacific. With nothing else that i have yet seen to compare this with. This is the best thing i have seen in my life ! Am still dazzled. I hear San-diego water world is better, yet to go there.
• Live Ice-Hockey at Staple Center los Angeles. Got free VIP enclosure passes and man was it worth it. LA-KINGS Vs Coyotes. The home team lost though and that was a bit of a dampner as the initial crowd involvement that was making the stadium go beserk was totally lacking. Final Score : LA-KINGS -2 Coyotes - 4
• Tried Mexican Burritos. Quite liked it.

Ice Hockey Pics.....

Aquarium Pics....

Been There.. Done That (2)

Here are few things on which, in times to come i can say....Hey! Been there... Done That

• Visited Universal Studios - Hollywood. Amazing!
• Drank water from the 'American' kind of water taps; where you have to bend and drink directly from the tap. I had only seen Kevin Arnold do that at his school in The Wonder Years
• Saw a network of freeways so complex and mingled! It was like lines scribbled and wriggled across a paper.Counted atleast 32 lanes of traffic. Either over us, parallel to us, below us, above to above us and below to below us !
• Drove past Hollywood Boulevard. (for some strange stupid reason was humming 'Louta de mera ticket to hollywood' all along the strech.
• Got lost on the freeways thrice ! drove an extra 13 miles to get on the right road again. Man ! some things are so simple back in India. Took a wrong turn? No worries, Stop the car, Right there. Put your hand out if you are not lazy, swrillllll , there... back on track again !

Btw peoples ! all the driving that is being referred to here is not done by me, I have a super Drivo-phobia!

Lastly, here is something i did not do for the first time again. Stood on the wrong side of the escalator and got some nasty looks from Goras and Goris ! I had done the same mistake once when i was in Prague. Well, I never learn from misakes !

Some Pics !

Bangalored In LA !

OK! so the famed LA night life that i heard about did not live upto expectations at all.

With some tips from the local friends read colleagues in LA 3 of us went to this beach side night club Sangria - At the Hermosa Beach. Couple of things that happened which made me feel as if i am in Bangalore after all and as i have always maintained. BOMBAY ROCKS !

One. 1:30 the nightclub is down. We were literally made to gulp the remanants of our drinks and shoot out. "Kill your drink" is the new term i learned yesterday! It means, Boy! either gulp your drink, flush it or dump it and leave ! Uncle Sam, I did not come to a LA night club to be puhed out at 1.30. Which reminded me of a party that we had at Hynt, a popular night club in Bangalore and the waiters there all but kicked us out at 11.00.Thats so not done ! come to bombay and i will take you to places which liven up at 1.30

Two. As we came out of this place, we see that all the nearby clubs have also shut shops at the same time and there is this huge crowd of drunk goras, who by the way i say act so much more wierder than our local bomaby taporis and bangalore rowdies. It was a commotion, for lack of more stronger words. The 'F' word was like the anthem ringing in my ears from every second converstation that i could hear.

Three. This one is the Killer. Made me feel so much at home. Would have flagged atleast 10 cabbies. none Stopped, Whoever did was not even interested to listen where we wanted to go and whoever did listen acted as if he dint listen at all. Which made me think, these cabbies have completed a crash course conducted by the Bangalore Rickshaw union.

Hmm ! so someone please tell me what is so good and different in LA that our sweet bangalore has not already shown us :-)

Until something happens here in the coming 2 weeks that i am here. I am not impressed !

Been There... Done that (1)

Here are few things on which, in times to come i can say....Hey! Been there... Done That

• Jet lag - I know what it is now. Experienced it first hand.
• A Drink in an international airport, waiting for my flight. (2 Pints beer at heathrow)
• Played Tennis. Man it is not so easy to do that easy looking serve and a backhand. OH MY GAWD !
• Rented a Tuxedo. Am praying i get to use it. Am not sure though, Well atleast i can say i Rented one :-)
• Used a GPS navigation system to find where to go and how.
• Saw Manhattan Beach Boulevard
• Did some typically desi stuff; calculated every dime i spend within a minute to how much it would cost in Rupees. I have promised i will stop it right now.

And heres something i did not do for the first time. I forgot to carry my camera to the Manhattan Beach :-)

Uncle Sam ! Here i Am !

It is more or less every Indian IT professionals dream to visit the USA. Call me wierd but i never had this fasination of visiting the US just to make a point that i have arrived in the IT scene.

I know of or atleast i knew of many people who would have give thier right arm to get a job in any junk IT company in the US of America in the 90's. Well, some of them have really made it big here, and some of them burst with the dot com crash in the early 2000's. Either way, agree or not USA is still among the most preferred destination for all techies in India. Even a casual conversation with anyone in the IT field would lead to the question ' Have you been to US?' or the declaration ' I was in the US last year, and....!!'

Well, After about 10 years of slogging in the IT scene it was my turn to say Hi to Uncle sam. and here i am, this post comes straight from The Residence Inn-Los Angeles El Segundo, CA.

Things.. People I Hate the Most Today....

Here Goes....

10. Promos of Saawariya
9. Promos of Om Shanti Om
8. A towel clad Ranbir
7. A oh-i-am-so-shy Sonam
6. Shahrukh and Farah khan
5. The song Masha-allah
4. Dard-e Disco is a Dard in the ass
3. All the TV shows going ga-ga over these 2 movies
2 .Six pack Abs
1. People who did not like Laga Chunri main Daag and the idiots who termed the movie as a flop.

Fasting Feasting

Campus... Rampus !

Had been to a Campus recruitment drive for my office at a deemed university in Coimbatore over the weekend, as much as i hated going there! I enjoyed a lot, met people who i thought exsisted only in films or books !

Everyone i met had a story to tell, some funny, some boring, some cute, some sad, some touching.

Few Excerpts....

**The Shy Guy**

A guy has written in Cv under personal qualities :Extrovert, confident, friendly.

During the interview I asked him,Tell me one bad quality about yourslef.

HE : I am a very shy person sir
ME : But you have wriitten you are an extrovert,friendly person!
HE :I am a shy extrovert sir.
ME : What is a shy extrovert?
HE : Me sir.
ME : Then why do u think you are an extrovert?
HE: I like talking to people sir.
ME : But you said you are a shy person.
HE : Yes sir, that's why I don't talk to them
ME : You are confusing me now
HE : Yes sir
ME : You agree you are confusing me?
HE : Yes sir !
ME : And why r u doing that?
HE : That's one more bad quality in me sir when I talk I confuse people. So I am shy
ME : Ah !!!!!!!

** The lover Boy **

ME: Tell me something about yourself, your personality,the kind of person you are?
HE : I like making friends !
ME : So... How many girl friends do you have?
HE : Three !
ME : Three !!!!! ?
HE : Yes sir
ME : You have three girl friends ? What did you join college for? Studying or flirting!!!
HE : No sir I don't flirt...
ME : You have 3 girl friends and you say you don't flirt ?
HE : Yes sir
ME : So you plan to marry all three...
HE : Oh no sir... I don't have lover... Just girlfriend !!

*****
ME : Why should I hire you?.
SHE :Because I am giving the interview.

******
ME : Why should I hire you?.
SHE :Because you are asking me tough questions which I am able to answer.

***
ME : Why do you want to join IT
HE : Because no other company comes for campus interviews

Fish Curry, Chappati...........

Some people touch our lives in such a special way that we remember them for life. They may not have bought you monetary gains, not done anything great. Come to think of it, they would have actually done nothing at all. On the contrary, they would have lost something of their own in the bargain. Their time, their money maybe. We would never know, these kind of people are such, they would not let you know.

I do not have anything to repay their kindness, love they had for me. A complete nobody for them. Hence This. Written with all my love and gratitude.

“Maushi” (loosely meaning Aunty), I knew you for less than four months of my life. You would have come across hundreds, if not thousands of care-free guys like me who came to your canteen in the busy industrial area in a small town of Goa. For most of the time I knew you, you were nothing but a shadow for me, moving about busily in the dark kitchen of the canteen where I came to eat food every day for 4 months, noon and night. I just saw you move around ever so busy, Saree tucked in the typical Maharashtrian way, sweaty, tired maybe. Busy arranging dishes for the lunch and dinner time rush. I never once bothered to peep in to check how you look, how old you would be.

I was busy. Busy thinking. Thinking that you have made the Chapatti (Indian bread) even thinner today, the curry you have made would be full of water. What you would have plotted to cheat us of the 18 rupee that we pay for the food.

After about 15-20 days of regularly cursing the food, yet coming there to eat daily as I had paid up-front for the full four months. You once peeped out of the kitchen, to check me out. A regular guy. I thought you would have asked yourself; Oh! This guy will not miss one day’s food haan, every day he will turn up as he has paid upfront, I think he will eat every paisa worth of food!

Instead, you asked me “Pora, Jevat nai ka barobar, Kiti Bareek Disto hai?” (Son, are you not eating well? You look very pale) and I again thought you are just making small talk to ensure, I do not ask for a refund and walk off. Just making sure you don’t lose out on ‘Money’!

Then I dint come for two days in a row, I thought you would have been happy. When I returned:

“Kuthe Gela hota, Bara hai na tu?” (Where had you gone, Hope you are well!).

“Bara hai mee! Phiralya gela hoto.”(Am well, went for sight seeing!).

I could not sense the genuine concern and care in your question or your voice. I did not even bother to see you in the eyes; maybe I would have seen something.

One such night, I came in famished. I can still smell the watery fish curry you made that night. The four chapattis of the standard dinner plate were over in less than a minute from my plate, before I could raise my head; I saw your hand put two more chapattis in my plate. With a pang of guilt hitting my tummy, I ate the two chapattis you put in my plate. I would pay for it anyway, Big Deal!!!.

“3 mahine rahnaar hai ikde, aankhin barik jhaala, tujhi aai mhanel barobar kalji ghetle nai maushi ni” ( 3 Months you would be here, if you become any more thinner by the time you go from here, you mother will say Maushi did not take care of my son)

No matter how much I think about it, I wonder how the food tasted so much better from the next day, the chapattis were just fine, the water from all the curries just disappeared. And I do not know if it showed or not, But I am sure I smiled when I was eating food there, everyday since then.

“Kai Maushi; Kashi Aahe?” (Hello Maushi, How are you)

“Me Bari hai pora, tu sang, Bhook lagli? (I am OK son, tell me are you hungry?)


Even when i asked about you, The question as an answer was about my well being. Suddenly I saw you; I could see the genuine care with which you asked me if I am hungry. It was not just a question. It made a difference to you didn’t it?

Every time you made the fish curry I had so-loved, you never forgot to put the 2 extra chapattis in my plate. Somewhere down the line, you stopped charging me for those extra chapattis. The fish curries started to have more fish pieces floating in them.

“Ithun 2 Kilo jasti gheon jaa, mala changl vatel” (Gain at least 2 more kilos before you go from here, I would feel better)

4 months ended in a jiffy. It was suddenly my last dinner there and I had a bus to catch the next morning, there was the best fish curry again in my plate, with the 2 extra chapattis, and touch of ghee on them. And the Sweet, a nice small piece of Barfi, Coated with love. I selfishly have taken to believe that I am the only person who would have ever gotten a Barfi piece in your canteen.

I touched your feet, and gave you a tight hug. You moved your hands over my head, blessed me for what I was and pardoned me for all the wrong thoughts I had for you and your canteen. With that, I walked out, Never ever to see you again. It is eleven years this month.

Maushi, I have moved on in life. If I ever come back to goa I may never eat in the kind of canteen you run, I would probably be on a corporate card dining in a star hotel, where one chapatti would cost more than what you fed me lunch for. A place where I am sure the waiter / cook would care two hoots If I am hungry, I am sure he would not let me have 2 chapattis for free because I liked the fish curry he fed me. I am sure he is not bothered if I do or do not put on weight. But I am sure no one can make the fish curry as good as you did.

Maushi, I hope you had a nice life since. I am sure you would have. You would have the good wishes of hundreds of people like me. People who did not care for your good deeds then, but have again and again remembered and thanked you. I am also sure; you did nothing to get gratitude in return. But there is absolutely nothing I can give you in return anyway.

Except maybe a big Thank You.


PS> Maushi, I have finally put on weight. From the skinny, lean 52 kilo guy to a healthy 70. The chapattis worked for sure :-) Thank you once again.

Police... Somebody Call the Police Please......

My day always begins with the cab that takes me to office arriving late. The same happened a couple of days back and I was waiting for a good 15 20 minutes for my pilot to arrive.

I have observed in Bangalore that whenever the idle time or waiting duration is more than 15 minutes, it calls for a "by-two" (tea) at the nearest tea stall. So off I went to Murugan tea stall.

As I was busy sipping tea from my plastic cup, which I have been told has to be held in a very peculiar manner with only two fingers, I observed a mean looking guy standing next to me ; with a "try talking to me and I will start with a punch in your belly" kind of look. I remembered a distant relative, and walked a couple of paces away.

Meanwhile a guy who looked like a simpleton walked towards me and asked me something in Kannada. Well I can understand a bit of kannada and can even shoot a few words. But I gave a plain shoo off buddy I can't understand a word kind of look to him and he walked away from me and went towards Mr.Mean.

Now the entire conversation that followed was in kannada, but is reproduced in English for obvious reasons...

Mr Simple: Do you know where Bashweshwar Nagar Police Station is saar?

Mr.Mean: WHAT!!!! What did you say? * In a very irritated tone**

Mr.Simple: Saar, I am asking do you know where Bashweshwar Nagar police station is.

Mr.Mean: Why? ** Rudely**

Mr.Simple: What do you mean why?

Mr.Mean: I mean why do you want to go to the police station early in the morning?

Mr.Simple: Just like that I have some work. Do you know where it is?

Mr.Mean: Do you think I am an idiot; no one goes to police station just like that. Tell me why you are going.

Mr.Simple: Visibly angry now. It is none of your business you know. You are standing here with no work; the least you can do is help others.

Mr.Mean: What do you mean, I am not your father’s servant, go straight, and take the second right and walk for five minutes it is there. I hope they lock you up. People like you who trouble others should not be walking free.

Mr.Simple: Ok. Thank you. Walks away as if nothing happened.

**Names have been changed to protect identity.

What kind of people were these two? :-)


Though I managed to understand around 60 % of the conversation, the rest was confirmed and translated for me by the tea stall guy. I am so glad he dint ask me, why do you want me to translate? :-)

Sun Signed.

Clicking on “Also read” links of some of the friends list I reached this place where a guy has a wonderfully amazing write-up on the zodiac sign prediction column writers in newspapers and magazines, It was so weird that I had thought of the exact same things he has written over there a couple of days back.

Now we all know for a fact that every sane person on this earth hates his or her job most of the time, does this chap hate his job too. I mean all a zodiac sun sign writer has to do is come into office; write twelve blocks of texts and leave? Nice eh?
I would love to have this job, but then I think he would love to have mine too?

He is so bound by boundaries, he cannot go beyond 12 signs can he? No matter how creative he feels on any particular day, he cannot go and create a couple of more sun-signs and satisfy his creative urges can he? STICK TO 12 No matter what!!!

Also some of these columns are daily, I guess these are the better lot.Some are weekly, some are monthly; I mean 12 predictions jumbled here and there across all the signs and I’m done for the month, can I get my pay check please?? Cool Job, No pressure, am sure no customer reading that prediction which went wrong would have walked in to the magazine or newspaper office asking for the writers head.

What is bad day at office for them? Just not being able to predict for Leo and Cancer?

Coffee machine conversation in a magazine office.

Zodiac writer: Man, just not able to figure out what to predict for Leo and cancer for tomorrow, have already mixed and matched all the good things for the other ten signs. Am I having a writer’s bloc? Dude I hope this is temporary... Can’t continue this way for long, appraisal is due next month and boss would rub this in for sure!

Fellow colleague: Don’t worry! Am sure it’s just a phase, remember the other writer also had the same problem couple of months back, but she’s firing all guns now.

Zodiac writer: Really? How, what did she do?

Fellow colleague: Nothing, she just took up a temporary assignment as ‘Agony aunt’ and listening to all the problems and the solutions she had new ideas on giving predictions once again, you should try something similar..


Now to the most important part of any career! Appraisals, Increments, Bonuses. What qualifies the performance ratings for these people, how are objectives set for these futur predicting guys.

Objective sheet:

• Number of times you write the same prediction for two different sun signs on the same day ! If you do this more than twice a month, BAD Rating ?
• Number of times you repeat the same prediction for different sun signs within a given time-period! you do this more than once a month, No BONUS !

Appraisal discussion

Manager: Buddy, your performance over the past quarter has not been so good; I hope you are aware of that.

Writer: Oh ya! Just read my prediction for my sun-sign for the today, Heated arguments with seniors expected, Money may not come your way easily. How close can anyone get to that boss?

Manager: Well, we are here to discuss consistency and not a one off on target prediction, your goof ups and repetitive predictions have been given me nightmares. I have letters from readers of the magazine that the zodiac sign column is clichéd.

Writer: Anyway, there is hardly any room for creativity; you have set strict boundaries which I am not allowed to transcend. I had once written “People committing adultery would get caught red-handed today” and that day one of the top boss of this magazine was actually caught getting naughty with his secretary and all the right people in this office kicked me in all the wrong places, my backside still pains sometimes.
This is the best anyone can do, and I can’t get any better than this.

Manager: Well if it gives some solace to you, be happy that your prediction for your sun sign is coming out to be true today, Money will really be hard to come by your way chap !

Writer: Whatever, be sure you read my predictions for your sun-sign tomorrow!!!!!

To and Fro I GO.............

Over the past few weeks, the traffic in Bangalore has been getting from worst to something which is best not talked about. I spend about 4 hrs average with my cab driver ; that is a tad less than what I spend with my wife(free time per day). Now is that not horrible. Earlier when I used to start from office in the evenings, I used to call up my wife and ask “So! What’s for dinner?”, rather I should actually be asking, “So! What’s for breakfast tomorrow morning? “. But, crib, curse or whine, there is actually nothing one can do, but to sit in that cab and wait for the traffic to move and the honking to end! Over a period of time I have devised a few things to keep myself busy in the cab... Here goes…..


1. How am I driving sticker! There are these stickers on all corporate cabs “How am I driving?” “Am I Rash?” “Give Feedback on 184830” etc etc, I wonder if some one actually calls such numbers and gives any feedback. So when I am stuck there with nothing to do, I have called such numbers and given them some feedback about the cab in front of me. No luck many times, either the mobile # is not reachable, or the person who picks up the call had already quit the job and was no longer responsible for taking feedback for that cab :-)

2. A thing which guarantees you about a hour of non stop chatter is asking the cab driver where he is from and how did he make his journey from his village to the IT capital of Bangalore. Some stories are genuinely touching, some are made up, and some make you laugh. But they guarantee you an early ride back home and some respect you in a very special way for hearing them for one hour. And from the next day, the cabbie does not seem irritated on you when you reach your pickup point a good ten minutes late!

3. My cell phone has about 157 ways of making noise. What better time than now to listen to each one of them and choose how my cell should ring when my wife calls, when my friends call and how to growl when my boss calls? Go on changing, scrolling through each of the tones. Now, you should also realise that is not a polite thing to do and it disturbs others who are busy gazing outside the window or dozing. After about 20 rings, ask a loud polite question,”Hey! Am I disturbing you’ll?” . No one has ever replied with a YES to this question, but their expressions always say YES YOU IDIOT! SHUT THAT CRAP, OR WE ARE GONNA THROW YOU OUT!

4. Read all sign boards you can see from the window , bumper stickers loudly, if boredom is too much spell out each board. Read number plates of the vehicle in front.

5. If sitting on the front seat, keep changing radio channels... If behind... Keep nudging the driver or the person in front seat to change channels... Tell them the correct channel name and number; flaunt your general knowledge :-) ... Once the channel of your choice is on... Sit back... Sigh a relief... And grin.

6. Open up a pack of chocolates or biscuits... Eat alone... Look around... But do not share... Enjoy the sadistic pleasure of getting those hungry greedy glares. Buddy if you ask I shall give, So don’t give me those greedy stares!

7. CURSE....LOUDLY... The government for horrible state of affairs in the city...the organization for setting campus so far from the city...the transport department for setting up horrible pickup routes where you go from one corner to another picking colleagues

These things have helped me so far to keep my sanity in the long journeys, well yet to see how many days before I go mad or change my job or change my house somewhere near… Till then I would continue with these and if I am bored with these, well I will think of a few more :-)

Bad Day....Good Day....

A bad... Sad Monday has begun.

Bought milk from the neighbourhood store as usual and instead of dumping it on the kitchen platform as I do always, I thought of going the extra mile to help mrs save some time by helping in emptying the packets and heating it.

Well what followed was some more work for Mrs. As I was expertly poring the packet into a vessel, my hand hit the vessel and splashed the milk in about a 100 mts radius. Well I didn’t wait there for help with cleaning the mess, lest I should do more damage. I ran for safety :-)

So much for being of help. But she was sweet enough to keep her cool :-).. Does that make this a good day?

Another thing, have forgotten my wallet at home, will have to arrange for borrowed meals and snacks today. So does that make it a good day ? :-)

Lesson for the day: All Bad Things have happy endings :-)

I am sorry... Teacher......

Well, What comes as a surprise to most of my friends is that I was a very very naughty student during my school days. I was punished almost every other day, I was never sitting on the bench that was meant for me ! I was either standing on it, or standing out of the class, or kneeling down near the teacher’s desk.

I have been punished by almost all the teachers I had, but yet in some ways I was their pet student too.

For the past few days, I’ve been nostalgic about one such teacher, whose life I made miserable in the classroom. My 8th standard Biology teacher ; Mrs. Shyamala.

Once, when she caught me doing one of my stupid pranks, She walked down to my bench, caught me by my ear and dragged me all the way to her desk. Usually I used to enjoy this stupid attention, when the whole class watched and giggled. YES! I am shameless :-) , But that day for I don’t know what reason, I was in a very pensive mood, and I almost burst into tears. She was more shocked at seeing me this way, than I was at what was happening.

I kept saying sorry, and that this is the first time I had done, whatever I was caught doing that day! And something she said in response to my pleads that day has been etched in memory.

“Everything has a first time, even bad things, Don’t do them, even for the first time”

But as I said earlier, I am shameless. I have done many bad things even after that, not only for the first time but many times even after that.

So.. This post is dedicated to Mrs. Shyamala my 8th standard biology teacher. Miss.. I hope you read this, And if you do… I am sorry for being such a horrible student, I hope you remember me and have forgiven me !

Hot Coffee .. Anyone ?

Simple office conversations that I overhear sitting at my cubicle or ones that someone gossip about at coffee junction are so hilarious.

The story goes in one office that there is this IT manager whom we shall call 'R' and he has some open positions in his team that are not getting filled for a looooong time, and he is OH SO! Pissed off with the HR female whom we shall call 'P'... and I have this story first-hand from ‘P’;

Scene I; Act I :-) R has walked into the HR work area to complain about 'P to her manager, all fretting and fuming...

R: It has been so many days since I raised the resource request, but I still have no CV's to process; how do you expect me to work like this

HR Manager: Take it easy Buddy, you know how it works; It is a hot skill that you are asking for. It takes time for us to source such CV's

R: I don’t know; I have to escalate this to Head of HR now, only that will get me some results I guess. It’s useless talking the same thing to 'P' again and again

P: Why are you getting so mad on me; I am doing my best, you have no clarity on the role you want, and you keep changing it yourself.

R: You don’t tell me what I know or not, learn to accept your mistakes

P: OKAY!!!!! 'R' Chill... I will do my best to close your position soon; Come.. Cool down and let’s go have some hot coffee

R: 'P'... I have come here all hot for you, and you want me to drink HOT coffee and become Hotter on you? I will be difficult to handle belive me!!!

P: #%^$&$%@#$

Me.........giggling since I listened to this :-)

Terror Terror on the Wall....

September 11 2001…

So! It’s been six years since Uncle Sam saw and experienced the pain of terror on their shores for the last time…..The punishment they inflicted on the perpetrators was so severe that they have ensured; at least till date that no one dares or plans any such attack on its citizens.

March 12 1993…

So! 14 years have passed since India saw its first but not the last taste of terrorism on its soil. The punishment we have inflicted on the perpetrators is so severe that Bollywood cannot release some of its unfinished movies as Sanjay Dutt got convicted. Most of the other convicts were mere puppets in the sinister terror plot. The masterminds who got away with this have by now realized that no harm is coming their way for sure…

If you follow the chronology of the terror attacks on Mumbai even when the trial was on-going for the 03/12 blasts, you would realize that India (Mumbai) has been struck at will.


The question is WHY? Why has the USA managed to keep it self safe ever since 09/11 and why are we sitting ducks.

The reason is simple, a sheer lack of will among the political leaders to see the bigger picture of national security and not politicize death.

Typical Indian reaction to subsequent terror attacks

• Call for a City/State/National Bandh to protest the inadequacy of the ruling government. SIR!!! Please grow up, or please explain how this will help.
• Walkout in the state assembly / Lok sabha / Rajya sabha. SIR!! Instead of walking out, can you please sit inside and discuss and decide how collectively you can tame this menace?
• FLASH NEWS!!! Terror Attack in Mumbai… RED ALERT in all Major cities…. Helloooo…. I don’t know about you, but I surely know Mr. Terrorist is smart enough not to fall for this
• FLASH NEWS!!! Terror attack in Varanasi Temple…. Security tightened at siddhivinayak temple in Mumbai.. PLEASE PLEASE PLEAASEEEE!!!! Hmm how many days, before the lone havaldar with a stupid metal detector goes back to his beedi smoking breaks?
  
  I would go on and on about the way in which we react[?], but that’s not the point here. Unless and until definite punitive action is taken, we are there to be blasted and blown….

Hope this ends soon..... for us... for everyone... Prayers for the dead and victims of terrorist attacks.

Environment friendly Dhaba

A menu card i chanced upon on my way from Hampi to Bangalore.... This is not the first time i've come across such funny menu cards, but never bothered to capture them in pictures... from now on.. YES !!!!

Well the snap is not that good as taken from a cell, but if possible strain and see the red circle, and also check the different spelling for snacks!

Lessons : From Kids who never went to school

BOMBAY! , a city full of kids who live on the streets, stations,bus stops, platforms etc.

Like most of you who may read this Blog, am a selfish, self centered person. we never spare a thought for these kids right from the time they walk past your sight. Once we take that rupee or two from our pockets and shove it in thier tiny hands , our good karma for the day is done !

We never bother to even think how thier tiny minds function?
How would she/he spend that money?
Does he/she really need this money to buy food,clothes OR is someone taking care of all that and making them beg/work.
If someone asks them to define happiness or comfort, what would thier answer be?

Inspite of all the hardhips that these kids must go through to live each day of their life, It is nothng but a pleasure to see them smile,laugh, giggle and play amongst themselves. It makes me really believe in the line 'Money can't buy you happiness'

There were 2 incidents in my encounters with these kids when i used to live in bombay, that left such a deep impression on me. They made me learn some lessons, and coming from these kids who would'nt have seen a school from miles away these are nothing but gems.

Boot Polish Boy
Age 7-9 yrs.
Strikng features : A smile. As if it is glued to his lips. Quick wit answers.
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BPB: Good morning Saab, Paalis kara lo na ( would you like to polish your shoes)
Me : Frown, Ignore, Walk away.
BPB: Follows me, Pesters me, Begs me to polish my shoes for 3 rupees.
Me : Frown, Ignore, Walk away ,Arey subah subah dimag mat kha (Dont pester me early in the morning)
BPB:Smiling always... Saab, kara lo na...Subah se boni bhi nahi kiya (Please get it done sir,i have not earned anything since morning)
ME: Tujhe pure station pe main hi dikh raha hu kya, mere pass kyon aaya(Can you see only me on this station, why did you come to me?)
BPB: Saab aap itne lambe ho, door se dikhai dete ho ( you are so tall, i saw from a distance)
ME: Acha! kal se main khada nai rahunga station pe,seat pe baith jaaunga,tab toh nahi dikhoonga tujhe?Meri jaan chod de (Oh Really ! then i would not stand on the platform from tomorrow,i would sit on a seat! you wont find me then!!!)
BPB: Saab, main toh boot paalis wala hu na, niche dekhke chalta hu, aap toh tab bhi dikhenge (Sir, my work to to search for shoes to polish, i keep my eyes down, i would find you still)
BPB: Kara lo na saab, main sab se 3 rupya leta hu, aap 10 rupya de dena ( Please get it done sir, I take 3 rupees from everyone, i wil take only 10 from you)
ME: Surprised, Irritated, shocked
ME: Kya !!!!! Sab se 3 leta hai, aur mere se 10 lega? Kyon be, Mere pe yeh meherbaani kyon?( WHAT !!!! you charge 3 from everyone and will charge me 10??? why this special privilage to me????)
BPB: Saab, Baki sab ne Kaala juta pehna hai, kam paalis lagega, aapne Safeed pehna hai, Jyada paalis lagega na chamkane main !!! (Sir, all other gents here are wearing black shoes, will use up less of my polish, you are wearing white, will take up more of my polish to make your shoes shine!!!!)
ME: This is when i looked down to see, i was wearing my reebok sneakers and not my black leather shoes.
ME: Laughing madly , Abey ! yeh juta bhi koi polish karata hai kya ? (Hey ! does anybody polish these kind of shoes???)
BPB:Doosre ka malum nai saab, aap mujhe 10 rupya de do, main aapka kar dunga ! (I dont know about others sir, you just give me 10 rupees, I will polish yours)
ME: Mere bhai ! mujhe nai karana yeh juta polish, tu yeh le 5 rupya pakad, Polish bhi mat kar and meri jaan chod de ( Brother ! i dont want to get this polished, here.. catch this 5 rupees, dont do any polishing thing, and just leave me alone!!)
BPB: All smiles gone ! serious, stern look on this face!
BPB: Naiiii Saaab ! polish nai karoge toh paisa nahi chahiye(Noo Sir! if you are not getting shoes polished, i dont want your money)
BPB: Walks away, without even as much as a second glance towards me
ME: Stunned ! Feeling so small and humbled by that one act.

It made me realise, only hard earned money can give you the peace of mind and a clear consience to really enjoy the pleasures that money can buy, and it was an uneducated,living on the streets boy who drove the point as hard as a nail in my head !

The Begger Girl
Age 7-8 years
Striking features : Eyes, they kind of were reading into me.
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Its one of those monsoon days in bombay, when it rains like the heavens have punctured a hole in them.

I get down from the rickshaw and walk towards the station, when i feel somone tugging my trousers. I look down to see a tiny girl pulling them, but not speaking a word. I assumed she is dumb, but later it turned out she was not. I am.

I nodded my head in a way, indians do to ask a silent question. She responded back by taking her hands 2-3 times in quick sucession to suggest that she is hungry and wants money to buy food. I told her, I wont give you money, Walk with me to the canteen on the station and would buy her whatever she wants to eat. She just looked at me , the eyes told me she said NO.

I walk off. But something in my head does not let me take off my attention from her and i turn back again and again to check that little girl sitting at a distance now.

I can sense the eyes glued on me, when actually they were not.

Finally i decide to buy her something, i buy 2 packets or Parle glucose biscuits and walk up to her and give them to her. she just grabs it from me in a single quick pull and looks away as if nothing happened.

In the selfish way that my brain functions, some part of me wants her to thank me, i want her to show some humbleness, some gratitude, After all i walked all the way again in the rain to give her something. how can she look away like that. Disgruntled and unhappy, i dont know for what... I walk away. Angry on that little child??

I still keep turning back to watch her, and this time i see her getting up slowly holding the railing behind her, bending down again,Picking up her cruthces and limping towards the bridge! I would have survived the pain of someone stabbing me with a knife, but the pain of that scene was unbearable. A part of me died in that moment.

My stare followed her, walking up the bridge, getting down on the other side, she finally stopped on the furtherest part of the station, and i could see her sharing the packet of bisuits i had given with 4 other people, 3 kids and one adult.

And... to think of it... i with a pair of safe,sound,hale and hearty legs... was expecting a lifetime of gratitude from a little girl, all because i walked upto her, and wanted to come out BIG !

WE ARE SO SELFISH ! our earnings may be high... our thoughts are stinking low.

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